If you think you might be depressed, talk to your doctor or seek help from a mental health provider. If you're reluctant to seek treatment, confide in a trusted friend or loved one. Sharing your feelings might be the first step toward getting treatment. Certain sexually transmitted infections — such as human papillomavirus HPV , bacterial vaginosis and trichomoniasis — can spread between women. Oral sex and sexual behavior involving digital-vaginal or digital-anal contact, particularly with shared penetrative sex toys, can spread infections as well.
The best way to stay healthy is to practice safer sex. If you have a substance abuse concern, remember that help is available. Local lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender health, mental health or community centers often provide substance abuse treatment.
Organizations such as GLMA also might provide referrals. Domestic violence can affect anyone in an intimate relationship. Sexual minority women might be more likely to stay silent about this kind of violence due to:.
Staying in an abusive relationship might leave you depressed, anxious and hopeless. If you don't want to disclose your same-sex relationship or sexual identity, you might be less likely to seek help after an assault. Still, the only way to break the cycle of domestic violence is to take action — the sooner the better. If you're a target of domestic violence, tell someone about the abuse, whether it's a friend, loved one, health care provider or other close contact.
Some sexual minority women struggle to find a doctor knowledgeable about their specific health issues and with whom they feel comfortable discussing their needs and concerns. The GLMA website is one place to find referrals for doctors. Summary Read the full fact sheet. On this page. Being a lesbian is completely natural Why some women are lesbians Knowing whether you're a lesbian Knowing whether someone else is a lesbian Telling people you are a lesbian Lesbian relationships Becoming sexually active as a lesbian Information about lesbian issues Where to get help.
Women usually question whether they are heterosexual 'straight' or lesbian same-sex attracted when they realise they are feeling attracted to other women.
Lesbians usually say their main physical, emotional and sexual feelings are for women. Many women report they have lesbian experiences or feelings, but do not think of themselves as lesbians or gay.
Being a lesbian is completely natural It is important to remember that: It is natural for people to be attracted to members of their own sex. It is normal and healthy to be a lesbian. Why some women are lesbians There is no real explanation as to why some women are lesbians and others are not — it is just a part of who we are.
Knowing whether you're a lesbian There is no questionnaire or test you can complete that will tell you whether you are lesbian or not. If you are a lesbian you may: feel attracted to other women feel you are different to your girlfriends or don't always 'fit in' feel confused because you're attracted to men as well as women. Knowing whether someone else is a lesbian You probably won't know if a woman is gay until she tells you.
Telling people you are a lesbian Before you decide to 'come out', you should consider who you will tell and what their reaction may be. Lesbian relationships The major difference between lesbian and straight relationships is that there are two women, instead of a man and a woman. Becoming sexually active as a lesbian Before you have sex, you should make sure that: you are ready to become sexually active — don't be forced into something that is not right for you both you and your partner trust and respect each other you are doing it safely — avoid contact with your partner's body fluids to reduce your risk of sexually transmitted disease.
Information about lesbian issues You can get more information from: reputable websites — such as Twenty10 or ReachOut. This will tell you what is on and how to access support and social groups. You can also subscribe to national magazines. A study by Dutch psychologists published in the March issue of the Journal of Sexual Medicine reported that 10 to 12 percent of male and female children who feel discomfort with their gender go on to identify as gay or lesbian as adults.
Meanwhile, just 1 or 2 percent of children who are comfortable with their gender identity turn out to be gay or lesbian. Adding to the confusion about what causes lesbianism is the slipperiness of female sexuality itself. Unlike men, who are usually sexually oriented solely toward men or women, and whose sexuality is essentially fixed from puberty on, a decade of research by the University of Utah psychologist Lisa Diamond and others demonstrates that women have greater "erotic plasticity.
Women are far more likely than men to "report remarkably late and abrupt onset of same-sex sexuality, often after heterosexual marriage," Diamond wrote in January in the Archives of Sexual Behavior. Having sex for the first time can be a little nerve-racking, no matter who you are or who you want to have sex with. For example, they could identify as bisexual , pansexual, queer, or even heterosexual. It also includes other people who have vaginas, people with penises, and people with intersex genitalia.
Heterosexual couples, for example, may have oral, manual, or penetrative sex. It all depends on the couple and what they like to do. Through school, the media, and our communities, most of us learn that sex is about a penis entering a vagina.
Sex means different things to different people. Masturbating can help you relax and figure out what feels good to you. You may find that touching yourself in certain places and with certain motions feels pleasurable. This can help you tell your partner what you enjoy. And if your partner has the same anatomy as you, masturbating may help you navigate their anatomy better. It may also give you a good idea of what they might enjoy. That said, remember that everyone is different. What might be pleasurable for one person might not be pleasurable for the next.
Asking for consent is crucial.
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